Fence Sittin'

Earlier this week I was speaking to a group of 8th graders about the difference between rights and responsibilities. The context of the conversation centered around what should be done if a person is being bullied or discriminated against. I asked if they felt any compulsion to get involved if the situation didn't directly affect them. If another person was in danger, did they have a responsibility to step in and help, or did they have the right to remain uninvolved? It was a great conversation and it rabbit trailed off into a few other interesting directions.

Those who felt mandated to get involved based their belief on the idea that doing nothing is the same as approving of what was happening. If a person bares witness to an ignoble act and doesn't get involved, then that person might as well participate because they are endorsing it. Allowing injustice to unfold without stepping in was viewed as cowardly and even inhumane by some of the students.

I ratcheted up the conversation by implying that helping out might cause harm to the person getting involved, but the kids didn't care. They believed we are responsible for helping others even if there is a cost or price to pay personally. When people do resist helping others then the world is a less-safe and more hostile place. It is up to us to improve this situation by refusing to stand by and let others be harmed.

But this was not a unanimous decision and other students protested that we have a fundamental right to not put ourselves in harm's way. They made a case for self-preservation and argued there is nothing wrong when a person takes care of their own self. We are not bound to an ethos that makes us responsible for others, especially those who seem to put themselves into dangerous situations repeatedly. Our first and only priority is to make sure we are okay.

The best thing about spending time with kids is that it permits us to look back over our lives and reflect on our own beliefs. Nostalgia mixes with idealism and then we snap back to the glaring reality that those days are over and we seldom have the luxury to separate our lives into near boxes that give us clear cut answers to grown up problems.

I'll let you decide which side of the fence you are on in regard to this issue. One thing, for sure, is that sometimes it easier to live in a world where hypotheticals exist. Unfortunately, that is not our reality.